Super Bowl 2012: The Hottest New Trailers Reviewed

He LOVES the trailers

The middle finger of an angsty British rapper aside, it was the trailers shown on last night’s 2024th Super Bowl which attracted the attention of the OTB team.

As American sports fans everywhere dawdled off to make cwarfee with maple syrup and pancakes, film fans were craning forwards to catch the brand new trailers for this year’s biggest upcoming releases. Here’s our round-up of what the action (in between the throwing and catching of a ball) had to offer:

The Avengers
A juicy 65 second assault on the eyes and ears provided a fitting fanfare to the the impending arrival of the Marvel superhero mash-up. Huge explosions, guns galore and Johnasson in a VERY tight catsuit.

Best part: Samuel L. Jackson. Wearing a patch. Saying the words: “We are hopelessly outgunned”.
Worst part: Precious little plot detail.

“Fire everything” yells a butch marine type who appears to have been struck by laryngitis and when it came to Battleship’s Super Bowl slot, that’s exactly what they did. Plagued by an inconvenient cohort of seafaring killer robots, Rihanna and Liam Neeson are soon to be attempting to blast the living crud out of everything.

Best part: That sound the robots make, you know, like the one Transformers make.
Worst part: Liam Neeson in a kind of baseball cap.

Act of Valor
Billed as “featuring actual active duty U.S. Navy SEALs” but looking more like a trailer for a run of the mill modern war flick, this trailer left us none the wiser about the content of Mike McCoy and Scott Waugh’s upcoming docu-flick.

Best part: The fact that it could be a fairly promising film.
Worst part: Eminem “singing” in the background.

John Carter

What’s the best way to make the absolute most of a 70 second Super Bowl slot? Well, in theory, it would be to put the entire film into a giant montage which eventually turns into the title of the film itself. In reality, this makes for one of the poorest opening sequences of a trailer known to man. Angry beasts and macho men combine in John Carter, coming March 9.

Best part: The end.
Worst part: The rest of it.

The Lorax
Vampire Weekend provided the plinky plonky soundtrack to the latest sneak peek at the Dr Zeuss adaptation in all its pastel-shaded glory. Audiences got a mere 30 second taster of what The Lorax will offer later this year…but then that was probably enough of an “eye-popping, jaw-dropping, high-flying, heart-stopping” preview.