How wonderful, just when you thought there weren’t enough shows for navel-gazing, micro talents on TV, Britain’s Got Talent continues its mission to provide a stage for hopefuls who will do anything for an hour or so of fame … or notoriety!
It’s true that within this crowded field of cowpats there is the odd four-leaf clover – they are just too few and far between.
Nevertheless, we’ve reached the semi-final stage and the final 40, yes 40, perform in the hope of impressing the judging panel – plus Mrs Miggins and the couch-bound masses ahead of the public vote.
So who can we look forward to tonight? Well, we have such stellar talents as the The Queen (an act that mines an exhausted seam of jokes), the rubber-limbed Vardanyan Brothers and among others, the incomparable State of the Fart.
Britain’s Got Talent Live Show – Tuesday 7.30pm on ITV.