Hot Like Us Review: What Fresh Hell Is This?!

HOT LIKE US: Wednesday 2nd November, BBC3, 9pm

Are you good looking? Are you in a relationship with someone good looking? Would you mind having your relationship torn apart by strangers? These are just some of the pertinent questions dealt with by BBC3’s latest reality competition, Hot Like Us. Yes, that’s right, eight beautiful couples will be taking British television to a new low (which we think you’ll agree, is quite a feat) as they battle it out to become a “model coupleâ€?. Judged by casting expert, Jody Furlong, and relationships expert, Emma Kenny, the loved-up stunners will be taking part in photo shoots and relationship tests designed to push their good looks and good lovin’ to the limit.

In episode one, the couples were set the task of “emulating the king and queen of model couples, as they take part in a revealing Posh & Becks-style underwear shootâ€?. Just to spice things up a bit, each half of the couple were asked to buy each other’s under-crackers. This provided significant comedy mileage for those without any hint of a mature sense of humour. The lads attempted to judge their girlfriend’s boob size in a number of ingenious ways including one who used his head to measure for cup size. He put a bra..on his head!! This show really does feel as though it reaches out to some of the least discerning viewers in audience-land. In some ways this is a shame; the issue of celebrity couples and average Joe’s quest for fame, fortune and a fit bod is a fascinating one and could be explored in a far more engaging way.

No surprise then that the competition aspect of the programme was neither here nor there in last night’s debut episode. Duff prop choices which went unnoticed for some couples, secured one aspiring Posh ‘n’ Becks a place in the bottom three. Furlong and Kenny having the occasional spat about the most important criteria by which to judge the lovers was probably intended to be exciting and introduce some controversy. But it actually ended up making the pair look incompetent and turned the whole affair into an utter farce.

The only real reason to watch this programme is to appreciate just how normal you and your partner are and to mock the arrogant plonkers who say things like “I’m genetically blessedâ€?. This is yet another example of reality TV where any guilty, voyeruristic feelings are quashed by the get-out clause we have all come to love: “These people chose to do it AND they have no visible mental problems. They are fair game. HA HA HA”.

One housemate to watch out for is Mun. This arrogant hunk of muscle is very proud to have been voted in the “top 10 best-looking South Asian malesâ€? in some competition. Don’t ask which competition or when exactly this occurred, because Mun ain’t giving anything else away. Last night, he enjoyed flashing flesh in a kitchen-based pec-off with fellow housemate, Ben, but failed to let anyone else know that he’s had four nose jobs, a boob job and liposuction to his face. What a hero.

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